Boots Blog

When we pair or juxtapose these two ideas with one another, typically, the conversation centers around our buying habits or wish lists. However, during self-talk, these two words take on a different hue.

For example, when we make statements like, “I need to get more organized.” or “I need to implement better time management.” or “I need to lose weight,” the word “need” throws us into the arena of victim thinking and we give up control. How, then, can you accomplish any of these tasks if you, number one, feel that something or someone outside yourself  has determined what is best for your life? Secondly, how can you cope when you feel like a helpless, hopeless, victim? Who wants that? I hope that you’ve answered, “Not me!”

Here’s the point: It’s semantics and this is one of the many reasons why self-talk is so important. For example, let’s say during your last review that your boss explains that you need to acquire better time management skills. As you exit his or her office, you run into a couple of your friends and they ask you how your evaluation went. You tell them that you need to acquire better time management skills. Your friends and you, immediately take on a downtrodden, victim, and woe is me attitude. You might ask, “So what’s the big deal?” After all, you may think your time management skills are fine and your friends are just trying to support you and demonstrate their empathy for the burdensome task someone has placed on your shoulders. Let’s look at this scenario again with a different perspective.

You come out of your boss’ office after the evaluation and your friends ask how everything went. You tell them, “You know what? I want to work on my time management skills because then I can be better at my job and eventually get that promotion I’ve been wanting.” The energy level changes from depressive to upbeat. Your friends – and you – are excited over the decision you’ve made and the way you’ve taken charge. Your friends will probably immediately begin to think of ways to help you achieve your goal.

What’s the difference? Acquiring time management skills has now become your decision, your goal, and you’re life is now taking on a direction that you want. So who’s in control now? You are the one in control and not victim thinking. It’s all about semantics.

As you know, semantics is the language used to achieve a certain effect on an audience. In this case, you and your friends are the audience, you being the most important member of the audience. Attitude is everything. A good attitude and persistence are the perfect mix of fuel to propel you through life to take you where you want to be, who you want to become, and bring you success that you can only imagine. Now, 1 – 2 – 3, take charge of your thinking and take charge of your life!